Almost all difficult communication issues can be improved by understanding how to set and maintain clean boundaries.   Having clean boundaries in a relationship means that each person takes full responsibility for his own thoughts, feelings, and behavior.  

This sounds simple, but if you are currently avoiding a difficult conversation, is it partly because you don’t know how to have that conversation without “causing” the other person to have negative thoughts, feelings, or behavior?  

And, at the other end of the spectrum, if you are in the midst of a relationship conflict, whether it’s personal or professional, are you blaming someone, at least partly, for your thoughts, feelings, or behavior?

I have included two important tools here:

Click here for the Boundaries Model.   This model gives you a visual of healthy versus unhealthy boundaries.  It can be enlightening, especially if you are a manager or a supervisor.  One of the most common places for boundaries problems to occur in professional settings is in boss / employee relationships. 

Click here for the Step by Step Boundary Setting Guide.  This is a great tool to help you build stronger personal boundaries so you have more time and energy for yourself.   If you are in a relationship with someone who “crosses” your boundary lines with unaccepatble behavior, you can use a conversation like this to “retrain” them.  It’s also a great tool to use if you have to give someone difficult feedback on behavior that is driving you nuts. 

If you would like me to come in and give a talk or a workshop on setting clean boundaries in professional settings, please use the contact form to reach me via e-mail or feel free to call me at (949) 495-1021.  Getting your team working with cleaner boundaries is one of the most important steps towards building a culture of ownership and responsibility.